Thursday, August 23, 2012

True Love is Funny

How do I know my husband loves me more than anything in the world?

That's easy. Becuase this happened:

Remember the first day of our vacation, when we hung out at a pool for the day? You may have noticed I was laying in a chair placed in the shallow part of the water, so only my butt and the top part of my legs were submerged. A while later I needed to empty my ever full-feeling-bladder-now-days and went to the apartment lobby to find their restrooms. I was feeling way too tired to squat, and I NEVER EVER sit on public toilets bare-butted, so I covered the seat with toilet paper, and did my #1 business.
After walking out of the lobby and all the way around the pool to reach my posse, since all the gates were locked, Patrick made a funny face.

Husband: Babe, seriously? You have toilet paper all over your ass.
Me: What?!?! Are you serious? OMG! (Started to dust off my backside....)
Husband: No, you are never going to get that off. It's everywhere!! Just sit down in the water before anyone else sees!
Me: I just walked all the way around the pool, everyone has seen! It's not from wiping, it's from the laying the paper on the seat when my legs were wet. (Picking tiny pieces of paper off....)
Husband: Okay, sure, just get it off.
Me: (100 shades of red....)
Husband: You are so crazy.

And this happened:

Pregnancy hasn't been the nicest to me in some unspeakable ways, and spending hours upon consecutive hours in the car with me, may not have been Patrick's smartest decision during such a stinky time in my life. As I squeenched my nose, rolled down the window, and hoped the fresh air would reach his olfactory sensors before my rank flatulence did, I began my apology and my vow to try and hold back more from then on.

Husband: Please never hold back your farts. I think it's so awesome that something so stinky can come out of something so beautiful.
Oh how I love that man for accepting me. Every piece of me. And not being too embarrassed to hang out with me after I walked around with wet toilet paper stuck to my backside.
Now that, my friends, is romance in it's true form. 

What's the most unconventional romantic thing that's ever happened to you?


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