Tuesday, August 27, 2013

I've Never Felt More White (Project Pretty Week: Who Knows)

(Project pretty is a personal commitment to share my weekly journey of keeping my non-New-Year's-Resolution: staying fit to improve quality of life while inspiring others to do the same. Let's all jump on the endorphin wagon!)

When I decided to try Zumba for the very first time, I totally wasn't expecting to pass out, which is what almost happened. To be honest, I've always been a little skeptical about how good of a workout Zumba could actually be, but since I love to dance and was looking for something fun to kick start my re-introduction to the gym after recovering from all my stupid injuries and medication induced ickiness, I was willing to give it a shot. 
I loved the music. Grooving to new school and old school Hip Hop, Pop, and Latino music was right up my ally. In-between the disguised squats and lunges, it felt a lot like being at the club, but with water instead of alcohol, minus the constant obstacle of shooing away strange men trying to grind on me, and without the fear of having a hangover the next day. Of course, a normal person would be dancing in synchrony with their instructor (their very talented African American instructor who knows how to shake her ass like she's on a Ludacris music video and move her feet to the Moroccan beat like Saleena), but I was doing good to shake my hips and try to look like I was following the moves all while not tripping over my two left feet or spraining a knee. I seriously have never felt more "white" in my entire life. 
"Don't over think it," she said, "Let your body move naturally to the beat."
This IS how my body wants to move to the beat, I thought to myself, awkwardly and a tinsy bit off rhythm......like Mary Kathrine Gallagher. Geez, Napoleon Dynamite could probably show me up!
Towards the end of class I started to feel really sleepy. Things only went downhill from there. Small black and brown spots began vandalizing my vision, growing bigger and bigger. I kept trying to blink them away, but around the time I could no longer see a single thing, I became distracted by the fact that my hearing was disappearing. Voices were still vaguely audible, but oddly distant, traveling to me in slow motion through some sort of metal tunnel. My brain felt so full. I stayed strong up until this point, careful not to make a scene or worry anyone, but my body couldn't stand upright a single second longer, so I plopped myself onto the floor and pretended to stretch.
After recovering my senses, I walked to the car and took two bites out of a snack bar I found in the console, only to realize it expired 14 months ago, (Ew! Note to self: clean out pantry), then headed home for a real meal. And to think, I was worried I wouldn't get a legit workout! In all reality, this was my first real workout since being on Metformin and I'm almost positive I was experiencing a blood sugar issue, but Zumba really was a fun way to burn some fat. I'll definitely be returning, but with substantially more to eat next time. 

Have you ever fainted?


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