I'm Not Crazy!!!....Or Maybe I Am........

     Literally MONTHS ago (about 3), I ordered a foam roller. I didn't want to rely on a trip to the gym for that extra good stretch that could only be provided by a huge circular wad of plastic digging into my back and legs. I started to second guess myself on ever ordering the dang thing, since every time I went to the office for a package pick-up it was never there. I searched for my emailed reciept, and could never find it, so I just diagnosed myself as "crazy" and moved on.  It's journey to...

Planets of the Sex

Source      If men are from Mars and women are from Venus, and Pluto no longer exists outside anything other than Disney World, than: Venus: What did you do today? Mars: (makes cave man noises) Venus: Did you get the oil changed? Mars: I couldn't find the drill charger. Venus: Why do you need the drill? Mars: To fix stuff. . . . . . (confused face) Why do you think? Venus: Like what? Did you go to the rent house today? Mars: Ya, I went to the store and got stuff to fix the fence. ****Two hours later**** Venus: Hey,...

If Frogs Could Dance

     In my first semester of Nursing School one of our instructors said something that would stick with me forever. "After this, you will never look at things the same. Once you're a nurse, you will always be an assessor of your environment. You will notice things that you never would have noticed before." It's true. I look at the pieces of people, put them back together, then try to figure out why and how they are the way they are. Physically and mentally. Maybe that's why I LOVE people watching. I miss the fantastic...

Glass Soup

     I was suppose to spend the weekend packing, but since I'm the princess of procrastination and the queen of leftovers, I managed to talk myself out of doing anything productive out of necessity and made a huge mess on the living room floor getting crafty instead, whilst devouring all the soup I made while I was sick. The wicked part about it all: if I would have packed like I should have, then there wouldn't have been a glass vase on top of the refrigerator, and therefore it wouldn't have fallen from the frig to disperse shards...

Thank you, Thank you

     Thank you, thank you. . . I. . . . .I. . . . . .ugh . . . . . .um. . . . . . am so unprepared to receive this award. I mean. . . . . .I didn't even have anything written down *cough, pulls a crumpled piece of paper from my pocket*. I give props to all the insane people that surround me every day, and would like to recognize the bad luck fairy that graces her presence upon me almost weekly, provoking and inspiring such grounded words to appear on my blog. I just couldn't do it without my animals. . . . . .and umm. . . ....

Permanently Made-Over

When I was a little girl I wasn't much different than I am today. One: I was a bit stubborn. Two: I had a vivid imagination. Three: If it seemed scary at the time, I know I'd think it was fun after I did it, so I didn't hesitate. This is probably why, despite my mother's many warnings not to walk on the back ledge of the couch, I did anyway. I vaguely remember pretending to be an acrobat and walking the tight rope. The only problem is, there was no net to catch me when I fell. And I did. Three days later my parents finally took me to the...

Turning Into Mother

    Have you ever put something in a place for safe keeping to only later realize it was so safe that you can't find where you put it?!?! Do you ever decide your life is majorly unorganized, spend an entire day re-organizaing everything, and the next week can't find a single thing? I remember my Father complaining about my Mother "hiding" things from him all the time. He used to get so angry about it. Uh, oh. I may have turned into my mother!      I'm so good at putting things away, you'll never find them again. And as...

A Lesson in Panties

     It's that time of year. Yup, you guessed it. The time when general health is put to the test, as you struggle to maintain your wellness while people around you are getting sick. So in that case, would you like me to save you from your next possible embarrassing moment in life?       Rule #1: A) It's important to remember that even though you don't feel well, you might should re-think wearing those 20-year-old-ratty-granny-panties, just becuase they're your favorite pair of old-faithfulls....

Fright Night

     Last Saturday could have easily been a nightmare. There were some scary elements to overcome, but in the end, I deemed it a celebration, which all falls into an appropriate category for such an occasion: early Halloween! It's a good thing this picture was over the toilet, because when I saw it from the side, I almost peed my pants!      I awoke from my short sleep, (I had worked the night before) to find Frankenstien Patrick in one hell of a mood. The Baylor Bears were getting...

Extra, Extra! Read All About It!

Extra, Extra! Read all about it! Kayla's gotta _____, and we're gonna shout it!!!! (Remember that cheer? You'd insert something really embarrassing into the blank, like a picking out the grossest, snottyest kid on the payground, and call it your friend's boyfriend?!?!?) I have good news and I have bad news; more good news, more bad news, and then some regular news. I'll mix it up, just for kicks and giggles. The good news is my head cold is kinda dwindling.  The bad news is it packed it's mucous luggage and made a...