Forgetting to Remember

I think we've been having a lot of fun lately, but I can't seem to remember everything we've been doing. Patrick is usually in charge of helping me gather all my things to leave the house and he's now added the phrase, "Don't forget your brain," to his script.

There's a cloudy memory about driving to BFE and eating copious amounts of crawfish indoors (because the weather rained on our water volleyball parade) to celebrate Ken's birthday and Memorial Day weekend......

Speaking of rain, we haven't had near as much as usual this spring (I haven't even felt threatened enough to pack my seasonal tornado storm survival bag), but that hasn't kept Callie from feeling like her world was ending for the tiny thunderstorms that've actually come this way. Sumo found her shamelessly hiding behind the piano for one of them.  

Then there was something like going to Tim and Lara's pool for lounging and lunch.....

I'm pretty sure we've been kicking back with Netflix (not that I've kept my eyes open for much of it)......

And as the fog clears, I can vaguely recall having a few lunch dates and making personalized bath supplies with the girls from work.....

.....Let's just say hanging with a bunch of women in places Gabriel can't be free to roam the floors isn't exactly his idea of the funnest date......

 ....But regardless, he stays true to being a gentleman and pushes the grocery cart for his Momma!!!
Here's to hoping whatever you find yourself doing this weekend (whether you can remember it or not) includes(d) fun!

Ready or Not: Week 38

Is it still considered nesting or just my obsession with style that I've made enough headbands and ties for every outfit Cotton has to last his/her first 2 weeks of life and then some? Screw all the gender neutral attire; there will be no question, when this baby comes out, to whether this baby is a girl or a boy.
We were all over the place for the weekend and I thought it'd be wise to have our packed hospital bags in the car with us wherever we went......just in case. After all, it's officially time to start giving this baby hints to exit the premises. 

"But I'm not ready," Patrick pleaded, "I need 5 more days....and then I'll be ready."

"What do you think will happen between now and 5 days from now? I bet in 5 days, you'll feel exactly the same way."

A lot of people pose the questions: Why in the world, when a woman is about to go through such a challenging period of raising a newborn baby on minimal sleep, would He design her body to be so miserably uncomfortable during the end of pregnancy, to the point where she can barely find a good position to lay and has to lunge herself out of bed every 1-2 hours in the middle of the night to pee? Why wouldn't He let her get as much blissful rest as possible to prepare for the hard times she's about endure?

This is where I think He got it right. If we were so comfortable, like our men, we would probably never feel ready to embrace motherhood. Instead, by the end of pregnancy, we find ourselves at a breaking point. There comes a time when a woman thinks to herself, "Well, I'm not getting good sleep anyway.....If I'm going to be awake at all hours of the night, I might as well have my body back and be able to love on something adorable."

But ready or not, after a weekend of spicy food, crazy changing weather, and other home labor inducing methods, my something adorable is apparently nice and cozy in his/her current residence. In the mean time, I'm loving applesauce (weird), would like nothing more than to eat ice cream with every meal (totally not weird), and am considering the mere fact that I can still shave without assistance a personal victory (I'm just extremely careful while using my a razor ambidextrously).
Operation evict Cotton to be continued.......

If You Didn't Already Know

Dave Matthews isn't just an amazing guitarist who knows chords that almost don't even make sense, and plays with some of the best musicians who share a passion for jamming over just playing a song the ol' boring way, he also has an overabundant collection of amazing lyrics. Sexy ones. Deep ones. Dirty ones. Silly ones. Ones that speak the truth.

This year there was no opener, just an acoustic setup. It started out with Dave and Carter, and with each song the stage invited another band member to join in on the action. Tim, then Boyd (who was apparently celebrating his 217th birthday---or somewhere around there....he lost track and stopped counting.....which is probably why he dropped his wand 3 times later in the show), then Stefan and Coffin, etc. Then after a break, the band returned to finish off the night with the electric setup.. 

Cotton thoroughly enjoyed his/her first Dave concert, dancing most of the night away, while I relied on lots of water, a really expensive snow cone (totally worth every penny at the time), and pure enthusiasm to carry me though the night as all the extra fluid in my body started to settle in my feet. 

Braving the heat with my love was more than worth it, though, because the Dave Matthews Band never disappoints. Allow me to walk you through last Saturday night's set list and you'll see why (if you're already a faithful fan, then you know this doesn't even brush the surface of their ridiculously good collection, but there's only time for so many songs in one night.)

"People stare and we just ignore......we just ignore everything.......kissing all the time......and I'm looking forward to much more....."

-Recently 

"I could never love again so much as I love you. Where you end and where I begin is like a river going through......Take me eyes, take my heart, I need them no more, if never again they fall upon the one I so adore."

-Grace is Gone

"Would you not like to be sitting on top of the world with your legs hanging free?......When I'm walking by the water, splish-splash you and me takin' a bath. When I'm walking by the water come up through my toes, to my ankles, to my head, to my soul, I'm blown away."

-Lie in our Graves

"You look the same. I mean, you look different, but you haven't changed........Funny how you take me right back again."

-Stolen Away on 55th and 3rd

"You've got your ball, you've got your chain tied to me tight, tie me up again.......Sweet like candy to my soul, sweet you rock and sweet your roll......I'm so lost for you when you come crash into me, and I come into you......In your eyes, love it grows......Forgive me for my haste, when I'm holding you so close to me......In a boy's dream, hike up your skirt a little more and show your world to me.....You wear nothing, but you wear it so well."

-Crash

"Now I'm thinking that you did all you could when you said, 'My love, take it slowly'.........Take me back to just before I was spinning. Take me back to just before I got dizzy. Take me back. It's amazing what a minute can do."

-So Damn Lucky

"We look at each other wondering what the other is thinking, but we never say a thing, and these crimes between us grow deeper.......People in every direction, but no words exchanged, no time to exchange them. When all the little ants are marching, red and black and tan. We all do it the same way."

-Ants Marching

"I'm sick of you, and I'm sick of me. I'm sick of war, and I'm sick of peace. I'm sick of sound like I'm sick of silence. I grow sick of the darkness until I'm sick of the light. I'm so sick that this sickness has me dying........So I will live as I see fit and there will be those who will not like it. But in the arms of a woman I found my way home. To the arms of a woman, I will always go."

-#27

"God or the Devil alone could not have made you up; the two must have worked as one, together.......Do know you what it is to feel the light of love inside you, when all the darkness falls away?......Love me baby, love me baby, shake me like a monkey baby and forever I am yours. I can't stop thinking about you, why would I want to?......I like my coffee with toast and jelly but I'd rather be licking you from your back to your belly; I think that I'm going to."

-Shake Me Like a Monkey 

"You crush me with the things you do........Lovely lady, I am at your feet, I want you so badly.......Let's go drive until the morning comes and watch the sunrise to fill our souls up......It's crazy thinking, just knowing that the world is round. I'm here dancing on the ground. Am I right-side up or up-side down? Is this real or am I dreaming? Lovely lady, let me drink you please. I won't spill a drop, no I promise you. Lying under this spell you cast on me, with each moment the more I want you....You know you crush me, baby......Lovely lady, I will speak to you sweetly. I adore you; I mean that you crush me." 

-Crush

"What I remember the most about that night is I love the way you move, baby. I like most liquor but I don't like Gin and don't always like the skin I'm in.....but I love the way you love me, baby. And I love the way you move........I'm not all bad but I'm a faithful sinner. I might get lost, but I'll be home for dinner."

-Spaceman

"You ain't never had my cornbread. It's a little bit of heaven and a little bit of 'aww yeah'......Make you wanna run around naked, 'cause you know it looks good on you."

-Cornbread

"Come and see, I swear by now I'm playing time against my troubles. I'm coming slow but speeding.......The difficulty's coming.......I will go in this way, and I'll find my own way out......I wanted to stay, I wanted to play, I wanted to love you......Why wont you ever be glad?......The way the rain comes down."

-#41

"Like the other monkeys here, I am a humble monkey....But then came the day I climbed out of these safe tree limbs, ventured away. Walking tall, head up and singing, I went to the city......Now I am the proudest monkey you've ever seen. Monkey see, monkey do.....Then comes the day....I turn to question me. I wonder do I want the simple, simple life I once lived in well?.....In a way they were better days."

-The Proudest Monkey

"Satellite in my eyes, like a diamond in the sky......Strung from the moon, and the world your balloon, peeping-tom for the mother station......Look up, look down, all around me......Someone's secrets you've seen......eyes and ears....have been in my yard. Tell me more, tell me more."

-Satellite

"Wanna pack your bags something small? Take what you need and we'll disappear without a trace......and then when we get to the ocean, we're gonna take a boat all the way to the end of the world. You and me together, can do anything."

-You and Me

"Could I have been anyone other than me?.......Sing and dance.....Dark clouds may hang on me sometimes but I'll work it out. And then I look up at the sky, my mouth is open wide; lick and taste. What's the use in worrying? What's the use in hurrying? Turn, turn, we almost become dizzy."

-Dancing Nancies

"I hear more than I like to, so I drown my head in a sense of humor. I laugh at what I cannot change."

-Drive In, Drive Out

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown because he was messing with the preacher's daughter."

-Belly Belly Nice

"What I want is what I've not got, and what I need is all around me......Sometimes a Jimi Thing slides my way and keeps me swinging. I'd like to show you what's inside and I shouldn't care if you don't like it."

- Jimi Thing,  Jimi Thing (Scat)

"Feel the ground against my back, counting stars against the black. Thinking 'bout another day, wishing I was far away. Wherever I dreamed I was, you were there with me."

-Sister

"No reason to get excited, the thief he kindly spoke. There are many among us who feel that life is but a joke."

-Along the Watchtower

Rebelious or Realistic? : Week 37

Cotton is officially considered full term!!! 

We landed a pediatrician this week where we'll be spending many a day in the next few years getting shots (seriously, that shot schedule is SCARY). Daddy Patrick kick started this new tradition by getting the Tdap vaccine during our prenatal visit, managing to get his dress shirt nice and blood stained for his return to work (I imagine he did this on purpose so he could look like he was out doing something really rough and tough during his lunch break.....but instead, when he got back, one of his coworkers notified him he had some BBQ sauce on his shirt. Epic fail.).  I didn't even have to distract him from post shot soreness the next day, since he fell down the stairs, mildly injuring the majority of his body.

Although checked by Dr. B last week (to get a baseline, since he was already in the area), he kept his findings a secret, and I'll continue remain in complete oblivion to the station/dilation/effacement of my cervix until 40 weeks.......as will he (against his will), because I'm refusing checks! Why risk infection or the possible accidental rupture of my membranes only to be tortured with the idea of "Oh, I'm 'this', so I could go any day now!".....and instead end up walking around like that for weeks, or the opposite "Ahh man! I'm only that?!?".....and feel unnecessarily disappointment. Neither result can predict when a woman will actually go into labor, they just offer quick satisfaction to our overly curious natures. Apparently I am the ONLY patient he's ever had request not to be checked. EVER. He says it's a true testament to my laid back approach and calls me his "rebel" patient.

I don't know about all that. What I do know is I'd prefer to stay away from those dreaded dinity stripping stirrups as much as possible. I'd need an army to help me get in those things these days, anyway, with as bad as my pubic symphysis soreness is at times! On some days I can't even effectively lift one leg at a time to get pants on, and you don't even want to see how ridiculous I look trying to get out of bed.
I've been having a ton of contractions, and used to wonder what exactly the term "lightening crotch" meant until I started experiencing it first hand.........trust me when I say, it's one of those sensations that is pretty self-explanitory.
I realize finding out I'm GBS positive really isn't the worst thing in the world, but I'm a little disappointed I'll be having to check into the hospital a lot sooner than originally planned, in order to receive IV antibiotics.

In the mean time, things are about stretched to the max around here. You may not be able to tell from this picture, but my belly button is now inside out, my wedding rings are bound to hanging around my neck until my fingers return back to normal size, and the skin in my abdominal region and lower legs is very shiny and taught. Even my normally long boney toes feel like little stuffed sausages.

The ol' wardrobe is getting pretty skimpy and it shows on laundry day. The girls laughed at me for 12 hours when I came to work in a modified pre-late-third-trimester white shirt. Sometimes staying within dress code is hard work!!!

You Can't Stay Here

I was kinda sad the baby shower trilogy was over, since it was so much fun having people I enjoy the company of all gathered together without much effort on my behalf AND getting to unwrap surprises for the baby. I really love surprises. 

But then we planned a hot date with Allison and Stewart and the surprise saga continued! Those sweet sweet friends of ours went out and found the most adorable Baylor gear for our new human, in the spirit of our first common interest as friends.

We introduced them to Jessica and Bobby shortly after, if you call screaming their names over the tunes of a Led Zeppelin cover band and hoping they could lip read well enough to catch every other word a proper introduction. As cool a joint The Grotto was, and as great as the cover band played, it wasn't exactly a conducive environment to catching up on verbal transactions, but who needs more than good classic tunes when there's fantastic food to be devoured? Besides, everyone knows Led Zeppelin must be enjoyed in loud doses.

After our carnivorous affairs, we decided to venture out into the charming downtown McKinney square, since 4 of the 6 of us had never been, and found ourselves sitting on a cozy little outdoor patio with romantic white lights hanging from the trees and another live cover band playing groovy versions of hip songs and alternative classics far enough in the background for us to gibber jabber about everything from work to play until all the chairs had been put up around us, the music long subsided, and the lights dimmed.

Not ones to need more than a subtle hint, we moved on in search of more. More music. More drinks. More time to soak in the beautiful spring night weather in the company of good people.

It wouldn't take long for us to figure out small towns close down early, and although we didn't HAVE to go home, we wouldn't be staying out another minute in McKinney.

Like everything, it was fun while it lasted, and seemed to be over too fast.  

The Secret Is Out

I'm not going to lie. I was an incy-wincy bit nervous about the girls putting a shower together without me.......and they knew it, too.

It's not all my fault. I mean.....I may admit to being a little controlling at times when it comes to putting everything together in terms of decor and theme ideas.....but they're the ones who have just let me take complete charge and aid in the belief that I possessed all the creative juices. 

And then there's the small detail that they had absolutely no nursery theme, specific colors, gender, or baby names given to them to help point them in any project direction. It was free-stylin' all the way.

Their secret is out in the open now, though. After seeing what they can do all on their own, I'm pretty sure my take-charge days are over, because they did an amazing job! 

I loved all the bright colors and small details they worked so hard on. 

Even the tiny clothes pins were decorated.

The theme of mustaches/bows/flowers was adorable.

And I can't wait to find out who will have the correct predictions on the gender guessing tree!

I thought for a hot minute I might not even make it to this shower, which would have been a shame, because it was amazing.

It all started with me completely spacing out on the location of the restaurant, resulting in my tardiness, followed by getting out of the car while trying to juggle the 3 hostess' gifts with the wind blowing the tissue paper out of the bags. 

I did exactly what I probably shouldn't have done and took off chasing after the paper that had miraculously grown legs and preceded to mock me by running down the sidewalk faster than I probably ever ran pre-pregnancy. 

When I finally caught up to it {the runaway tissue paper} (it under-estimated my stamina and determination and gave up to catch it's breath for a moment), I bent over to pick it up, lost my balance and almost fell flat on my face. The take away from this is while I didn't actually flatten my face, I did over use some muscles that were probably better off left dormant, and I'm positive I looked ridiculous in the process.......right outside the window where all my shower people were waiting. 

You'd think that'd be enough clumsiness for one day to teach me a lesson in being careful, but alas, you'd be wrong. I recomposed myself and the presents at a cement bench outside the front door, took a brief look around to make sure no one was staring at me like the spectacle I was, and then tried to smoothly walk in, like nothing had ever happened...........which is exactly when I misjudged the length of the bench and jammed my knee directly into it, leaving behind a patch of skin as a souvenir for it's victory. Sigh.

A little bit later Patrick showed up, sped walked past our table, and headed straight for the bar. While fresh bread and cookie cake was curing all my ailments, his remedy of choice was a shot of vodka......or two. Apparently it was a rough day at the office, but then he got his very cool Diaper Dude bag, modeled it down the runway, and all his troubles melted away. 

I didn't get near enough pictures, especially of all the lovely people who came, but one of the my favorites is this candid group shot, with Gabriel trying to slyly snatch my necklace, Ale investigating the situation, Cristina hysterically laughing while her little man innocently watched from his car-seat, and Jessica teasing Patrick, our photographer.

We have so many generous, thoughtful people in our lives whom love to laugh and celebrate the joys of life. 

Truly blessed are we. 

Thank you, everyone, from the bottom of our hearts, for helping us be so prepared for Cotton's arrival!!!! We'd be lost without you!

Running Out of Womb: Week 36

Cotton gave us a scare this week!
 I got worried when I hadn't felt him or her trying to beat me up, like usual, for a little over a day and had been contemplating on whether or not to call the doctor about it. Subtle weak movements here and there with few in-between just isn't the typical for this baby and several thoughts started racing through my over-active NICU nurse mind. What if something really is wrong with the baby and me not saying anything in fear of it being "silly" resulted in a fetal compromise? 

Knowing Dr. B's office closes early on Friday's, I decided to not waste anymore time or effort worrying and just gave them quick call, which resulted in me be being at his office less than an hour later for an ultrasound to check things out......which resulted in more thoughts. Oh crap, what if this is the day I end up delivering? Cotton would be a late pre-term baby, which would probably be fine if we had a girl, but if we had a whimpy white boy could end up in a NICU admission. I don't even have my GBS screening for 4 more days, so I'd be GBS unknown! Will there be enough time to get the proper doses of IV antibiotics before the baby is born so he/she doesn't have to have blood drawn and get an IV? What if they decided to admit me for further fetal monitoring? I don't even have a bag packed, which would mean Patrick would have to do it later and that would be the opposite of ideal. We don't even have our prenatal-pediatrician appointment for 6 more days.....I'll miss my shower this week.....We won't get to see Dave Matthews next Saturday.....

I called Patrick to give him the scoop and crossed my fingers and toes he wouldn't have a heart attack with worry before we were able to get some answers. (I think his heart is okay, but when he finally made it to the ultrasound room, I heard him take about a million deep breaths and I'm pretty sure I noticed a couple of new grey hairs on his head.)

Whatever the case, Cotton decided to perk up for the camera, although still refusing to reveal his/her face. The ultrasound even went a little long since the tech couldn't measure the the total biophysical profile until Cotton moved his/her hands away from his/her nose so we could get visual evidence of practice breathing. The BPP, biophysical profile (a collaborative calculation of baby's health based on a non-stress test, breathing movement, body movement, muscle tone, and amniotic fluid index), was 8, which is about as good as it gets and Dr. B confirmed everything looked great. At this point in the game, any movement counts as good movement, and the normal jabs and kicks may start to feel more like nudges due to the increase in the baby's size/running out of "womb". Regardless, he assured us calling was the right thing to do. "Call about anything, everything. Never just worry. When in doubt, I want you to call."
"We really need to pack our hospital bag," Patrick sighed. For real.........
Since that little episode, he/she has been back to his/her normal crazy moving self, I've pre-registered at the hospital, started putting my hospital bag together, and had my GBS screening/cervical check done (which I'd heard from multiple sources was a painful thing, but I used the finger drop method I learned from Hypnobabies, told myself it wasn't going to hurt, took a deep breath, and didn't feel a thing).
Although I'm beyond excited to meet our little one, I'd rather him/her wait until at least 38 weeks to make an appearance into this world......but every day I get a little more ready to see what this phenomenon called motherhood is all about!!!!